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- MY GOOD MEN! The beards have come! Care for them with beard shampooo & conditioner containing my best beard oil! I declare your beard will look like a rabid mongoose no longer!
- I MUSTACHE YOU A QUESTION GOOD MAN. Do you tire of owning 47 different types of beard balm, beard wash and beard conditioner? Well, here is a solution better than that Trojan horse idea.
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- I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU ABOUT FACIAL HAIR GROWTH! Tea tree! Rosemary! Biotin! Aloe! Argon Oil! Peppermint Oil! Manuka Honey! Eucalyptus! I rest my case good man.